United Kingdom: Conversation - Part 1
From ExecutivePlanet.com
General Guidelines
Most Britons are reserved by nature and often find it difficult to indulge in small talk with a complete stranger. Indeed, there are situations where idle conversation is actually frowned upon, for example when travelling on the London underground; in these circumstances, a newspaper will act as a defensive tool in public whilst also providing potential material for subsequent social intercourse in private.
On the whole, northerners tend to be more immediately friendly than southerners, although true Scottish Highlanders will hardly say a word until you get to know them better and Welsh farmers can be especially taciturn. You should not be offended if people outside the 'Home Counties' of southeast England address you in apparently familiar or overly affectionate terms such as ‘dear’ or ‘love’ (whether you are a man or a woman).
For the most part, the British speak in low, moderate, measured tones without raising the voice or gesticulating wildly for emphasis. They also like to maintain their own personal space and will shy away from those they find invasive.
Although not all Britons are particularly articulate, you should make an effort to speak in complete sentences; the British generally find the North American habit of trailing off in mid-sentence rather irritating. Nor should you interrupt someone; intonation conveys one has finished speaking and, in British English, the voice normally goes down at the end of an affirmative sentence.
Britons prefer to avoid animated discussions; if an argument does become heated, it is quite likely to have been fuelled by alcohol and it may be time for you to make your excuses and withdraw. For this reason, unless you are desperate for human contact, it is usually best to avoid sitting or standing at a bar. Obviously, this is doubly applicable for women. In any case, a newspaper or some work to look at should again afford a degree of protection from bores and boors alike.
It is always advisable to try to initiate conversation with open questions rather than an assertion of a personal point of view. The British are largely tolerant and open-minded but every nation has its bigots and many Britons derive their opinions from the tabloid press, which typically expresses itself in black-and-white terms (the UK’s sometimes fraught relationship with the EU and continental Europe generally represents a prime example of the way in which opinion can divide into two extremely entrenched camps). This phenomenon is exemplified by the archetypal London taxi driver whose often extreme opinions should be taken with a large pinch of salt. Almost all Britons, however, are proud of their culture and heritage and this should be respected not mocked.
A major difficulty in effective communication can be the British predilection for self-deprecation, which manifests itself frequently in the form of irony and litotes. Usage reflects the level of educational attainment but everyone tends to understate everything, whether good or bad. A pensive ‘hum’ may convey enthusiasm or hostility - or indifference. This may be disconcerting for foreigners, especially Americans, who are more accustomed to a forthright directness that Britons find embarrassing.
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